Thursday, October 1, 2009

The L-Files: Mysterious Laundry Happenings

Why is it, dear Internet, that no matter how many I buy, I NEVER have enough hangers? Come laundry day (which, to be frank, comes about once every 1.5 months, because I have an inordinate amount of clothing) I am always left scrounging around, looking for hangers. Although I do shop a lot, I just don't think that my shopping to hanger ratio is so disproportionate.

Maybe my closet eats them.

No, that's irrational. Closets can't eat!! Maybe there's a vortex IN my closet that sucks empty hangers inside itself and then turns them into dust and blows the dust all over my shelves. That would explain so much.

And in other unsettling laundry occurrences, I've been losing a LOT of socks lately. Stupid dryer vortex. Apparently my apartment is a right cosmic center for quasars and other intergalactic phenomena.

AND (oh, yes, there's more) this is the most disturbing thing of all: Today I put my bras in one of those little mesh bra bags (so the hooks don't snag your other clothes, of course). I remember for sure that I put them in the bag, because I set it aside and forgot about it. I loaded in my other delicates and started the washing machine. Then I turned around and saw the mesh bag, so I threw it in with the rest of the load.

When the wash cycle was done, I loaded the dryer handful by handful (because my washing machine won't stay open due to poor shelf planning by the apartment complex) and I suddenly noticed that a bra was in my hand. One I DEFINITELY had in the mesh bag because it is my 'spensive and fansssy brassiere.

The bag was nowhere to be found. NOWHERE.

Unless it's in the dryer. I got tired of bending over, so I gave up my search pretty early.

But still, CREEPY. Cue Twilight Zone theme song.

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